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I had an interesting, but funny, experience on the airplane headed to New York last week.  I sat by two nice women and we struck up a conversation about their jobs, kids, hobbies, etc..we had a nice chat during takeoff.  The pilot turned off the seat belt light after getting in the air, which meant, as it always does, you can push your seat back now and relax.  All three of us proceeded to do so at the same time.  But as I did so, the man behind me pushed his knees as hard as he could into my seat to keep me from coming back.  I tried again.  He pushed again, and this time called out "There’s no leg room…you can’t come back."  I was stunned!  The women beside me were too.  And they kept telling me how rude he was.  But they got busy with their magazines and I enviously looked on from my VERY upright position!

Over the next 10 minutes, I had some decisions to make.  Was I going to take this lying down?  Was I going to be threatened by his actions?  Was I going to allow him to take away my power and decide my fate for the next 3 hours of the flight?  Was I going to sit there demurely and keep my mouth shut or was I going to fight for myself?  Was I going to be my own captain or allow someone else to steer my ship?  Believe it or not, all of these questions came in to my mind.  (I know, I know…some of you will think this is silly because for you it would have been automatic.  But for me, confrontation is not always something that comes naturally…at least usually). 

Thankfully, I decided to stand up for myself.  I turned where he could see me and I said (nervously…he had a NY accent, a white undershirt and uncombed hair and all of the people around us were looking on in anticipation),

"I’m going to lean my seat back now, because when I bought this airplane ticket it gave me certain rights and one of those is that I can lean my seat back, just like you can."

He replied loudly, "Well, I only have two inches and that’s not enough leg room!" 

"Yes sir, I understand that, but so do I and I’m now going to lean my seat back." 

He fought me on it, but I persisted and was able to have a relaxed nap for part of the flight.  He even leaned forward about 5 minutes later and patted me on the arm and said, "OK – it’s fine now" (I think that’s the only apology he could muster).

Are you allowing another person to captain your ship or decide your fate?  Are you resisting confrontation, but suffering as a result?  Sometimes, I’ve decided, it’s not worth it.